In every marriage relationship, there is some kind of trauma. We either bring it with us from childhood into the relationship and/or it is created during our marriage experience. Regardless of the the cause or origin, trauma can open up a huge gulf of disconnection and contention between us, OR it can bing and weld us together more than ever before! It all comes down to whether we choose to fight against each other or join together and battle the trauma united as one.
There are 5 essential steps to seeking unity and connection when faced with trauma—
1. Get down in the ashes and sit with each other in our emotions and pain (we must fight through the urge to run away from pain).
2. The automatic "brain reaction" is to go to a place of "deny and defend." Instead, we can choose "validation" and "inquiry" to help each other through the process.
3. Instead allowing the "survival brain" to take us to a place of rationalizing and justifying, we can choose to be accountable.
4. A typical response to trauma is to default to "victim mode" and/or feeling sympathy. A better option is to seek to show TRUE empathy.
5. When we're tempted to "shut down," emotionally and mentally, we can instead step forth the give support.
When you battle trauma together, your marriage can survive porn addiction and even thrive!—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/can-marriage-survive-porn Your marriage can even survive the trauma and devastation of infidelity!—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/how-to-mend-your-marriage